I accidentally had phone sex last night
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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