We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
