To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
