In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
It's never too late to be topless.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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