i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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