I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
