I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
