please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
im holly from the hills drunk
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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