My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
