The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
She just used a chaser for red wine.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
