are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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