Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
