why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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