we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
