i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
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