I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
