Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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