So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
