she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Randomize