So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
