Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
you would pick up someone in the library
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
