You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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