he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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