is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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