I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
