ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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