Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Randomize