Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Randomize
