the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
