foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
