Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
