i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
