im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
