it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
