He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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