Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
