hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize