SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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