I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize
