Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
