Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
