THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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