Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
