Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
