im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize