dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
