My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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