K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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