I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize
