I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
